Anxiety hates exposure

Anxiety hates exposure.  If you are anxious about speaking on the telephone, anxiety will only grow if you always avoid the situation.  The best way to tackle this is to expose yourself to the thing that makes you anxious.   

Start slowly, though.  Don't try and hold fifteen exceptionally important business calls all in one morning.  Try calling someone who you feel safe with, a close friend or family member, for example.  I have had some clients in the UK who called the speaking clock as a first step.

When you try exposure, monitor the thoughts that are popping up in your head.  Are you making assumptions about yourself, and the other person?  Are you assuming that you will make a mistake?  Are you assuming that, even if you make a mistake, that it will matter that much?  And are you assuming that the other person will really care, even if you do make a mistake?  

And monitor the voice you adopt.  Are you speaking to yourself in a kind voice, accepting mistakes, and supporting yourself in these first steps to managing the situation?  Or are you judgmental, critical, and even punitive?  If so, would you adopt this voice when you talk about another person who is trying this exposure exercise?

Have a go, and let me know how you get on

Chris Warren-Dickins LPC is a Licensed Professional Counselor in New Jersey. 
To book an appointment, please telephone +1 (201) 862-7776 or email chris@exploretransform.com