Anxious about something you are about to do?  Write about your thoughts and feelings at each of these stages:

1. Before the event. Resist making anxious predictions
2.  During the event.  Resist trying to mind-read or guess what is going on.
3.  After the event.  Resist catastrophising the event and assuming everything is worse than it is.

Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W: www.exploretransform.com

​In this video I explore addiction (including the cycle of addiction).  If you need to talk to a trained professional about addiction, do get in touch.
  
Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W:  www.exploretransform.com

Anxiety thrives on perfectionism.  So the burning question to challenge anxiety is:  'Does everything have to be perfect all of the time?'

Are there some small ways that we can loosen the grip a little, and accept the less than perfect?  It might be that you need to warm up to this slowly, so try some minor ways to embrace imperfection:  Simple examples include wearing odd socks, leaving the house a little untidy, or not finishing the latest novel you have been reading (and you have been hating since chapter one!).

It is up to us alone to ease the pressure we put on ourselves.

Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W: www.exploretransform.com
​

Still unsure whether counselling is right for you?  Have a look at this short video and decide for yourself.  
​
If you are interested in counselling or coaching, do get in touch to book a free initial appointment.

Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W:  www.exploretransform.com

Two of the many skills of assertiveness are: 

1.  The ability to ask for something, and
2.  The ability to say no

Consider to what extent you use these skills when you interact with other people.  What is it like to ask for something, and to say no?  Are there certain assumptions that stop you from being more assertive? If so, how helpful are these assumptions? And how realistic?  For example, is it causing you problems to assume that you are someone who cannot say no, for fear of seeming unreasonable?  Is it realistic to expect that you will never say no to anyone, no matter how unacceptable their behaviour becomes?

We all have our limitations, we all need to erect boundaries at times.  The only person who knows where those limitations are, and the only person who can enforce those boundaries, is you.

Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W: www.exploretransform.com

If you are avoiding situations due to anxiety, this is known as ‘safety behaviour’.
But if the threats are imagined, could your ‘safety’ instead become your prison?

Consider how you might be able to give up at least one 'safety behaviour'.  This is known as exposure.  The key thing with exposure is to stay with the discomfort.  If you give up as soon as you experience any sort of discomfort, then your anxiety will win.

Hopefully, if you start small, gradually exposing yourself in a small way to what you fear, you may discover that the discomfort starts to subside.  You may then start to see the 'safety behaviour' as obsolete, and you have taken the first step in regaining control over your life.
 
Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W: www.exploretransform.com

Two essential components to a relationship:

1. Assertiveness - Eleanor Roosevelt once said:  “Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent”, and
2.  Forgiveness - Put your effort into maintaining the positive relationship, rather than settling old scores

A complex balancing act, but perfectly achievable

Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W: www.exploretransform.com

If you are feeling the burn of anxiety and stress, sometimes it is not enough to talk about it.  Sometimes you need to tackle it in a multi-pronged manner.  

In addition to an exploration of your thoughts and feelings, consider how active you are.  Could you incorporate a little more exercise?  The release of adrenalin can often reduce the intensity of stress and anxiety, and it can give you a clearer head to really tackle what is troubling you.

Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W: www.exploretransform.com
​

The way we evaluate a relationship is often based on values from our past.  Why not break old habits and see the present reality for what it really means to you.

Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W: www.exploretransform.com

7 tips to combat depression:

1. Challenge the ‘rules’ you live by (for example, to be happy I must be successful)
2. Strengthen your skills of assertiveness
3. Express your thoughts, feelings and needs
4. Depersonalise events (for example, do not assume something goes wrong because of something you did)
5. Use support when it is offered.  Seek it if it is not
6. Be realistic about your resources and what you can achieve
7. Allow for regular relaxation and regular exercise

Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W: www.exploretransform.com
​