Stress, anxiety, anger, depression, hopelessness, despair… These are all emotions that can seem to be out of your control. When they become intense, you can end up feeling trapped and alone.
Here is one way to take control of your emotions, and it comes from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), an approach developed by Marsha Linehan. Quite simply: If you are feeling stress or anxious or angry or depressed or hopeless or whatever other emotion, Check the Facts.
How to Check the Facts
If your emotions do not fit the facts, or it is not wise to act on your emotions, you need to act opposite to your emotions. For example, if you feel intensely angry at your boss and you have chosen not to communicate this anger (because there is nothing that can change about your job), you will need to force yourself to do everything that would be the complete opposite to what your emotions are telling you to do. This could include some or all of the following -
Alternatively, when your emotions fit the facts, problem-solve instead of acting opposite. You can find out more about problem-solving here.
Let me know how you get on with this. If you still need help, get in contact.
Chris Warren-Dickins, Psychotherapist
Ridgewood, New Jersey