Relationships can endure pressure, and sometimes the pressure builds so much that they are fractured. If this has happened to your personal or work relationship, here are a few steps to take -
1. Decide if you need or want to repair this relationship. If you weigh up the pros and cons of having this person in your life, you may realise that it is not worth continuing with the relationship.
2. Assuming you want to keep this person in your life, or you have no choice, you need to figure out how to repair that relationship. This can be hard if someone has hurt you, or you believe that they have wronged you. You need to develop compassion for this person, and one way is to try and empathise with how they may have viewed the situation. Try and understand why they may have behaved in such a way. You don't have to agree with someone to empathise with, and understand where they are coming from.
3. Even if you can understand where someone is coming from, it can be hard to truly repair the relationship. The final, and most essential, step is to develop compassion for that person. To develop this compassion, there is a mindfulness exercise called the Loving Kindness Meditation. This encourages you to hold the image of the person in your heart, as if a parent were holding their child. This often takes time to master, but it is worth it.
I have recorded an audio version of the Loving Kindness Meditation, so you can use it whenever you need to. I hope you find this useful.
If you would like to find out more about anxiety, you can view free resources here.
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Chris Warren-Dickins LLB MA LPC
Psychotherapist, (Licensed Professional Counselor), Northern New Jersey
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