Monday's weekly roundup

If you missed the last seven days of posts from me, here is another chance to read about the following topics:
 

• Two sides of the same coin - Negative and positive experiences are two sides of the same coin.
  To live fully, to truly move on from anything negative, you need to accept both sides of your experiences
• “Women seek help – men die” - ​As men we sometimes believe that seeking help means that we are admitting defeat, and that we are somehow less of a man. But could the concept of seeking help actually be a sign of strength and intelligence?  I discuss this in a radio interview (recorded a while back). Have a listen and let me know what you think
• Relationships - Any sort of abuse is destructive - If you are in a relationship, do you recognise the signs of abuse?  People often think of sexual abuse, but there are other forms:  financial, emotional, physical and verbal.  Abuse in a relationship, in any form, is a destructive force.
• The cost-benefit analysis of depression - Depression is kept alive by two basic assumptions - That there will always be a negative outcome, and that you are somehow deficient.  Challenge these assumptions by finding evidence to disprove each assumption.  For example, you might be able to find at least one example of when there was a positive outcome.  In addition, you might be able to find at least one small reason to say that you are not deficient.  If you can find one small piece of evidence to disprove each of these assumptions, that means these are not the immutable truths that you once believed them to be
• Assess your assertiveness:  A simple equation - In any relationship we need to feel as if we can assert ourselves.  Without being able to communicate our feelings or needs, we will end up feeling at best stifled, and at worst abused.  Assess your assertiveness by carrying out a simple equation:  How much do I do what I want to do + how much I do what others want me to = ​Level of assertiveness
• Anxiety hates exposure - Anxiety hates exposure.  To really fight anxiety, you need to expose yourself, in a gradual way, to more and more of what you are afraid of
• Distracted by negative thoughts? - We can all become distracted by negative thoughts.  When we are feeling vulnerable, these thoughts can seem overwhelming, and it can be hard to find a way through.  Simple mind exercises can help us to clear the fog.  Even if it is just for a moment, this can offer the opportunity to regain control and see things more clearly.  Here is one suggestion to help you

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Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor
E:  chris@exploretransform.com
T:  07816681154
W:  www.exploretransform.com