Wedding buzz killed off by living under a tyranny of ‘shoulds’? Relationships often transform once the initial excitement has subsided. You can be left with a bitter aftertaste if you expect life, and everyone living in it, to be a certain way. This is known as the 'tyranny of shoulds': He should think about my feelings before he stays out late. She should know that I need time to myself.
We all have needs, and so the 'shoulds' are an attempt to communicate these needs. But your needs are more likely to be met if you consider these three things:
This is part of the Relationships Toolkit, and this can be found at http://www.exploretransform.com/relationships.html
Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor