Two of the many skills of assertiveness are:
1. The ability to ask for something, and
2. The ability to say no
Consider to what extent you use these skills when you interact with other people. What is it like to ask for something, and to say no? Are there certain assumptions that stop you from being more assertive? If so, how helpful are these assumptions? And how realistic? For example, is it causing you problems to assume that you are someone who cannot say no, for fear of seeming unreasonable? Is it realistic to expect that you will never say no to anyone, no matter how unacceptable their behaviour becomes?
We all have our limitations, we all need to erect boundaries at times. The only person who knows where those limitations are, and the only person who can enforce those boundaries, is you.
Chris Warren-Dickins BACP Registered Counsellor