What keeps you feeling stuck?

Are you feeling stuck in any of these destructive patterns? -

1. You blame yourself when things go wrong, or you constantly feel shameful or guilty.
2. You are frequently on edge, gripped by the belief that you are never really safe.
3. You feel powerless or unable to control most things in your life.

These are examples of negative beliefs about yourself.  They are unhelpful because they often over-simplify reality and distort reality.  For example -

1. A negative belief about responsibility or defectiveness distorts reality so that you end up blaming yourself for something that is not your fault.  For example, someone who experienced the trauma of a sexual assault might blame themself instead of the perpetrator.
2. A negative belief about safety or vulnerability distorts reality so that you disproportionately assess danger, leaving you feeling like you are permanently unsafe or unable to trust others.
3. A negative belief about power or control distorts reality and makes you believe that you have no power or control over your life.

EMDR can help.  EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy and it is recognized as an A level of treatment for trauma (World Health Organization).

Part of the EMDR process involves identifying the above negative beliefs and helping you to find a more adaptive (or realistic) way to view yourself and the world around you.  For example -

1. You are able to place responsibility for the sexual assault with the perpetrator, not yourself
2. You are able to establish that you are safe now, even if you were not safe back then
3. You are able to identify ways you have power and control over your life now.

There is more to the EMDR process than this, but I thought you might find this useful to start the ball rolling.  If you need to find out more about it, have a look at my EMDR pages.

I hope you find this helpful.

Chris Warren-Dickins LLB MA LPC
Psychotherapist in Ridgewood, New Jersey
www.exploretransform.com